The things that go through my head

First the teabaggers and now 2M4M? They make making fun of them soooo easy.

Blogging is such a mixed bag sometimes. I love to write and I love feedback on my writing, even if it’s just the occasional comment from the three or four people besides me that actually care about this blog. If you get a following on a blog that you update regularly, after a while you can feel like you have to produce something every single day, even if you would rather splash around in the mud puddles or clean the house or fret about a major life change. I recognize that I love it when people bug me to update the blog because it means that somebody actually cares about what I have to say. But when I don’t want to blog it feels like such a chore. A very strange combination of factors conspired to keep me from blogging for the past few weeks. The fact that I bought a new laptop and I have had the worst case of writers’ block because I am not used to it. I realize that this makes me a very strange cookie and that I should not admit to being this weird on a blog under my real name.

That’s another thing about blogging that sucks. I am continually reminded by the so-called “real world” that everything I put on this blog is accessible to the whole world FOREVER! And that is such a bad, horrible terrible thing. I can’t think of one good, sane reason to care about being held responsible for the things that I say. I stand by them, and if I am serious about that, I should post my thoughts under my real name, by gum. So that’s exactly what I do.

I say that and I mean that, but I can’t help fearing that I engage in a little bit of self-censorship on this blog. There are many times when I think “Can’t write about that, I don’t want everybody to know that!”

Anyway, what has finally spurred me to give up my lame writers’ block excuse is the absolutely ridiculous reefer madness being displayed by the dead tree media of late. First we have this lame dog pile dumped into the Star Phoenix. The dripping disdain for medical cannabis is apparent in the tone of the article and the fact that the editorialists couldn’t even bother to get their facts straight about this issue. They declare that if only that user of “doobies” had just respected the owners’ request to move, there would have been no problem. If only those pesky groups that are continually discriminated against would just go away and quit demanding their rights and to be treated with respect, everything would be peachy keen and smell of roses. As if! This line of thinking brings up a few questions that I think everybody should think very deeply about, before getting defensive and dismissing everything that I have to say.

Why do people get so upset about the idea of cigarette smokers sharing their spaces with cannabis users? I simply do no understand why it is justifiable to punish medical cannabis users in this way. It makes no sense. Cannabis smoke is far less dangerous than tobacco smoke. There is more pollution and second hand smoke being spewed out the back-end of cars than by even the largest group of cannabis smokers. Why the double standard? I can already hear the response from the reefer madness indoctrinated crowd. “But Tanya, marijuana is illegal!” It is very true that people have fought a constant uphill battle to have the well-documented and extensive medical use of cannabis recognized and respected. There was never an excuse for the government to punish people for growing plants. It’s absolute bullocks and inexcusable. There should never have even been a need to prove the medical use of cannabis for it to be allowed to be used legally by people that need it.

This is my long-winded rambling way of saying that there is no excuse for the ridiculous drug laws. Nothing good has come of imprisoning millions of harmless drug offenders, the majority of whom are in prison related to cannabis offenses. Just put that in your pipe and smoke it. The government spends all this time and money punishing people for using the wrong drugs and we have literally nothing to show for it. Unless you consider escalating rates of drug use and HIV infections an accomplishment.

If I get around to writing a proper response to this sewage published in the Star Phoenix, I will be sure to publish it here. I think it’s time for a letter to the editor.

But wait! The reefer madness propaganda machine is just getting started. We get to hear my main man Obama mocking the people who responded to his request for feedback on his site and demanded that cannabis be taxed and regulated. Apparently, putting a stop to jailing people for their personal drug habits is beyond the pale for the Grope and Flail * and simply must be mocked and disdained with witty remarks about wondering why anybody would think that President Obama would want to legalize the demon weed. But they made a grave mistake by dismissing the 53% of Canadians that think cannabis should be legalized. What gives Globe and Mail the right to do that? The politicians and the media are both out of touch with what the people really want.

* To use Canadian Cynics’ terminology.

That seems to be what ABC news reporter Emily Friedman wants you to believe. I mean, when I first read this story, I truly couldn’t believe my eyes. Are there people out there earning over $250 000 that do not understand how tax brackets work? Check out this quote:

Dr. Sharon Poczatek, who runs her own dental practice in Boulder, Colo., said that she too is trying to figure out ways to get out of paying the taxes proposed in Obama’s plan.

“I’ve put thought into how to get under $250,000,” said Poczatek. “It would mean working fewer days which means having fewer employees, seeing fewer patients and taking time off.”

“Generally it means being less productive,” she said.

I really should have written this blog post yesterday because it appears that they have updated the article to reflect a tiny amount of common sense. But they still have the fools stating that they would cut back the amount that they work if they had to pay more taxes on the money they earn over $250 000. Cutting back to fewer hours because of this proposal is just ridiculous. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face.

If you really want to laugh at some incredibly foolish people, go ahead and check out the faulty logic and reasoning of Instapundit. He is blaming the downturn of the economy exclusively on the election of Obama. C’mon, now. Is anybody buying this nonsense? I sure hope not.

Just in case you don’t understand how tax codes work, go ahead and read this nice summary.

I should also mention that I found this story on Pandagon.

I have done my best to refrain from posting about this Michael Phelps bong story as it is  a complete waste of my time.   I know that everybody expects me to care about the big pot kerfuffle because it involves my favorite plant.  But why is the fact that a famous athlete smoked pot even a story? Why does anybody care?  In a sensible world, the fact of an athlete inhaling the burning fumes from a medicinal herb would hardly raise an eyebrow.  Never forget, that cannabis is the safest medically active substance know to humankind.  That not a single person has ever ingested enough cannabis to die of an overdose.  Realize that cannabis in no way has the negative health outcomes of many readily available and used over-the-counter drugs such as Tylenol or recreational drugs like alcohol.  Right now, somewhere on Planet Earth, or while you read my world famous Friday 4:20 series, a group of teachers are throwing back brewskis and barley sandwiches like its going out of style. I would never dare to begrudge these fine educators their legal and socially acceptable drug.  I just wish that people would put Michael Phelps “youthful indiscretion” into perspective.

However, as this story has unfolded, I can not help but be amazed at the depths of inanity that the human race can reach.   The first foolish thing was Phelps so-called buddy taking his pic and selling it to a cheesy British tabloid.   I hope that idiot enjoys his money.  I hope that his identity becomes widely known among his circle of friends and they can tell him what I am dying to say.  “Piss off, dick.”  After the pic was released the world went:  OMG PHELPS BONG STONER GOING TO POT LOSER!!11  Once that dust settles and some of the media move on to another user of socially unacceptable drugs A-Rod. But some other media go ballistic.  People speculate about the punishment that Phelps should face for his terrible crime of devoting his life to sports, winning 14 Olympic Gold medals and inhaling the burning fumes of an illegal but relatively harmless plant.  It doesn’t take long for the verdict to be read.  Phelps loses his lucrative Kelloggs’ contract due to “his bad image”.   He gets suspended from competing for three months.

I contemplated boycotting Kelloggs in my own head, as I felt it would be a futile gesture of support at best. But what the hey, I love to jump on a good bandwagon.  I won’t be buying anymore Kelloggs products until they smarten up. If those marketing people had any sense they would put out a Special Edition Kelloggs box with the bong-hitting photo on the front.  After all, you have to be wicked high to enjoy Kelloggs, right?  Put my name on that petition.

I ran across this recap of the Phelps non-story and felt compelled to agree. I can not watch the video, I sure wish I could, so if you are Canadian you have to settle for reading the transcript.  But the worst was yet to come.  You see, eight people have now been arrested in connection with the bong-smoking incident.   Seven charges of possession and one charge of trafficking were laid against the party-goers. It’s pretty hard to believe that smoking pot should be this big of a priority for Sherriff Leon Lott when there are actually real crimes to worry about. You know, rape and murder and assault?  Yeah, you have better things to do.

I mean, how stupid can we really get?  I can’t even believe I’m writing this crap while contemplating taking pictures of me defacing the Raisin Bran box in my cupboard.  How can this even be?

When I started this blog and my Friday 4:20 series, I was hoping to limit my pot-posting to once a week.  So much for that.

Prepare to be amused and horrified by this clip of Sarah Palin being interviewed by Katie Couric. I have never in my life felt sorry for a politician, as they are a bunch of blood-sucking insects. But watching Palin humiliate herself was really awful. Please, just drop out of the race already and put a stop to this madness.

Watch CBS Videos Online

I opened the Star Phoenix this morning and in between the articles covering the Beijing Olympics, the tragic news of the death of yet another Saskatchewan soldier, and the apprehension of yet another high-risk pervert, was an article showing that coffee harms the performance of firefighters. Here is a link to a similar article in the Vancouver Sun, since I can’t find the SP article to link to.

Do you have any idea what this means? They are coming for our coffee pots. It’s bad enough that you can’t light up a cigarette on an outdoor patio in Saskatoon (HA good luck enforcing that law) pretty soon they will be coming for our coffee pots.

Did you know that every single school staff room has a coffee machine? If they find a way to take coffee away from the fire fighters, teachers will be next. I can see it now. Articles in the newspaper questioning the performance of teachers under the influence of caffeine. Serious screeds written by important sounding people with letters after their names questioning the wisdom of caffeine impaired educators. Somebody will say, “Dear God, What about the children?”

Many teachers will approve of the coffee ban. Many will say “It’s about time!” Pretty soon they will tell stories of how it used to be when teachers could drink coffee. Remember that time that Mr. Teacherson was zipping around the classroom all hopped up on caffeine, will be whispered, as all the teachers proudly discuss which brand of bottled water is the best to carry around in their trendy save-the-planet water bottle, which certainly does not contain bisphenol A. Of course, the water bottle will be clear to show that we are definitely not sneaking a caffeinated beverage into a dark colored bottle.

But then, as I am preparing for class, a friendly colleague, who knows about my love of the bean, will take me aside and inform me that there is a special, top-secret meeting, at Ms. K’s car at 8:00 am before class starts. I will give her a questioning look, but she will implore me to keep the meeting a secret.

I wonder if I should go to the meeting. What could it possibly be about? Why me? But curiosity will get the better of me and I will be right there like a dirty shirt. I get to Ms. K’s car, and do you know what I will find?

Steaming cups of delicious coffee! Like junkies seeking their caffeine fix, we will all be crowded around her, waiting our turn. We will guiltily sip the forbidden, caffeinated fruit and hope that the principal doesn’t stop by. Maybe she will be there too, waiting for her fix. That’s how we will keep out of trouble, we will give the principal her bean for free.

That’s how the coffee black market will be born!

Sound crazy and far-fetched? Well, if they could do it to marijuana, they can do it to coffee! Just you wait, people.